I got this article on a kenyan site an thought its an interesting read…
“In the spirit of keeping things old school, funky and fresh, I thought I would write something small and meaningful about keeping your body tight!
So personally Me I (Me I) used to work out so that I can impress the chiles, I was a little fascinated by what Abs, biceps and some Quads could do to a chiles mind when she sees you. I assume its the same thing that a chilez boobs and biabz do to most guys when you take a quick glance. However the only thing chics don’t realize is that it takes hard work to develop sijui muscles, biceps, tones and such things. In fact lets just say its hard work.
I’d rather be told to take slim fast or sijui go for a day without dish and I will look fine or lean, than be told to carry stones all day..
So for me I started working out in college in the US, coz I got tired of punk ass 19yr old Kids looking bigger than me and trying to chapa me. Junguz are huge ni cherembez so its just fucked up. Growing up in Kenya you mainly grow up on Organic food by default, maziwa mala, ugali and some hard core chicken thats kaukad – looks like its been roaming around the block for two years.
Although I think another thing working against us African men is our culture, I think African chiles like a guy with a kitumbo, its a sign of wealth he he he .. a small polite pot (look at all our ministers and how they have chiles… and kamata all the chics in South C and Imara Daima…) So its already been engraved in our minds that a small polite pot is an okay thing to have. So long as its manageable.
Anyway so now that I am all grown up, I am bila time for gym – am too busy to visit the gym or even jog. Its been challenging to keep up with the tones and shapes. The other day a mama asked me to job with her, kumbe the damn chile is going out with Kiprono Kiprotich – damn chile ran more than 5 miles (I told her to find me at Starbucks drinking a Latte homie)
However recently something unfortunate happend to one of my jamas, dude got hospitalzied and ended up ni ICU because of sijui cholestrol. Such nonsense.. how can cholestrol put you in ICU… Its the saddest thing to watch your boy go through some tough times and the doctor talk to you about doing some tizi am like what!!! That shit shook me up so much, I think I signed up to Golds, 24hr fitness and Images in Westlands (just in case I am in Kenya and need a fitness gym). I think I even signed up for Yoga and pilates.
You know most of us old folk cant figure out that we are growing old and out of shape, until you take a shower one day, wipe you ass down and then realize that there is a misely drop left in your mokonyo (naval) that you cant seem to wipe. And it always falls or drops down on its own when you sit down on yoru big fat couch. (Shetani ashindwe)
Its ridiculous, if I worked out as hard as I drink or drop Heineke’s I would be a superstar. That’s probably why one of my hands is bigger than the other one (or maybe coz I use it for other tizi – he he he he )
Anyway the moral of the story here for all my jamas just keep your shit tight, try to visit the gym as regularly as you can, if you are over 30yrs old. Get a physical – your ass is old (trust me) no need to convince yourself that you are still 25yrs old. You can even pepeta to ten forget it, just go to hosi get a physical, find out whats good and whats not. Stay away from that nyam chom you passionately like and lenga all this stato dish… Find farmers market and die broke… healthy but broke.
And if all this fails – don’t worry, many guys stay fit and still end up getting pranged by a moti and chip – but at least they die happy, fat and unhealthy but they enjoyed life. Who knows!”
